Let's talk about online profiles

Let’s talk about MSN Messenger for a bit. Everyone these days have MSN Messenger. It is one those wonderful new modern inventions which has given us, via the Internet, a whole new way of ignoring each other.

How MSN works really baffles me. You get on your computer, start it up, wait for it to finish loading Windows, double click on that MSN icon, then type in your password, wait for it to successfully connect, and once that happens, completely ignore or forget the fact that you are on MSN Messenger. Surf the Web? Sure, no problem. Check your email? Go for it. But do not, whatever you do, respond to any messages popping up on MSN Messenger.

What is the logic behind that? Do we go to parties, all dressed to the nines, with drink in hand, just wandering around the guests, and when people try to talk to you, you just say, “Oh please don’t talk to me, I am away.”

Why are we always AWAY on MSN?

What’s the point of even showing up online in MSN?

I know what some of you will say, “Oh I just leave myself online in case someone has to leave me a message.”

Okay now, whippersnapper, there are two flaws to that theory.

1) How important can the message be, when that person leaves you that message while you’re AWAY? For all that person knows, you ain’t even in the same room. How irresponsible is that?

If you know someone is not at home, will you still knock on his door to tell him that his girlfriend is cheating on him?

KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!
“Hey uh, JIM? I know you’re not at home right now. I just uh.. wanna let you know that I’m having sex with your girlfriend.”

To me, a message left on MSN tells you a couple of things about the person passing on the message. He is not interested in: -

a) Your part of the conversation,
b) Looking at you or,
c) Hearing your voice.

Suddenly, that person has forgotten that he has a handphone. It is not acceptable for someone to pass along an important message via MSN while the recipient is AWAY, which will probably be read too late, unless of course the person giving the message is stranded in a desert, marooned on an island or trapped in the boot of a car, in which case he won’t have Internet access either, thus making it a moot point.


And, seeing as you are AWAY, how will you know an important message has come in? What are the ramifications of you not getting that message?

“Hey dude, you going to Allison’s All-Bikini party later?”

“What? I didn’t know about that! Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I did, I left you a message on MSN”

“Yeah, but I was AWAY wasn’t I?”

“But you were, technically online, weren’t you?”

“Yeah, but still, AWAY!”

“So you weren’t online?”

“No I was, but…”

“So you’re saying to me you were stuck in limbo between being online and not?”

“No, what I’m saying is, that while I was online, I was in a situation where it would have been just the same as not being online.”

“Then why were you online?”

“Look I don’t know how to answer th-”

“Alright, I gotta go now! My camera’s memory card is in for a longggg night.”

“You’re going without me?”

“It’s an ALL – BIKINI party! Don’t worry, I will let you know all about it later alright?”

“Yeah. Just leave me a message on MSN.”

Thus, we come to the conclusion that you can’t justifiably get pissed at not getting messages left on MSN for you while you are AWAY. It won’t hold up in court, your friend will just laugh in your face, and you will look like an idiot.

Now we come to the second flaw to the theory which of course, is --

2) Who will be sending you messages on MSN when we know that everyone else is AWAY, waiting for people to send them messages?

That’s all for today.